The year of 2007 was a turning point for my son and me. A turning point because we were at odds with each other. My son, in my opinion, was not living the kind of life that he was taught as a child and growing up in the Lord. Before I get into the one thing that turned my heart let me explain a little about my son.

He is my first born, my only son. He has the best of his mom and dad. (Probably more of the good from his mom) He is outgoing never met anyone that did not almost instantly become a friend to him. He has always been like that. When he was four years old and walking through the grocery store with his mother and little sister he readily talked to anyone that would give him the time. He is uniquely gifted as all children are. He could captivate an audience of adults with his knowledge of fish. At the tender age of 10, we happened to be taking one of our many Saturday outings as a family. This day we were in Galveston, TX at the Moody Gardens. At the gardens is an aquarium with many different species of fish, my son was explaining to all those around about some of the unique species of the Amazon. I was amazed at how interesting he was and how interested those around him were. To him he thought all people knew these things. Today, as a young adult, he still holds court with anyone that wants to know about fish and many other topics I might add. A gifted young man indeed. My son, I believe, was probably the smartest child we had, (not taking anything away from the other two) the problem was he would not apply himself. That was a source of consternation for his mom and me. We just did not get it, how could someone be so intelligent and not apply themselves. There are other life stories I could tell you but one that is special to me is a comment he made to me one day as we were sitting in worship service. He leaned over to me (he was about five I guess) and said: “Dad would you wake me if Jesus comes!” Out of the mouth of children come great truths.

Now fast forward to the 2004-2007 period. That was the very problem I saw as key to my son’s attitude, he was asleep, and he was not ready for his Lord. Oh, he could say and do all the right things but it was a Sunday thing. I was to a point that I wanted him out of my house; I was ready to lay down the law, excuse him from my house. His mother was his saving grace. Her wise counsel was all that kept me from kicking him out. One of her comments to me was: “if you put him out of the house you are putting him in the very environment you’re trying so hard to keep him from.” Of course, she was right, had I forced him out of the house I would have given him over to a world bent on taking him away from the Lord. I often asked God what happened to my little boy, my teenage son, while not perfect very respectful and considerate of his parents. Our, wife and me, collective frustration was taking its toll. It was affecting every corner of our marriage and family home life. It was the worst of times.

What was the turning point? Two things actually; first I realized that my son in many ways was just like me when I was 22 yrs. old. Rebellious very much an “I’ll do it my way” kind of attitude. Now I lived by myself so I did not get much grief from anyone, especially my parents. I had left my first love, Jesus Christ. I had grown accustomed to sinfulness, in fact enjoyed it. My life was churning like a Tornado on the plains of West Texas destroying everything in its path. My lies, my lack of respect, my negative disposition toward anything spiritual, but more importantly my betrayal of Jesus. I was living a life that I had not been taught to live. I picked up these from bad influences, some whom were fellow youth in our church, but mostly the world. So how could I be so critical of a son that was allowing some of the same things that snared me to dominate his life? I came to realize, and have known for a long time, that our sin will take us further than we want to go and gives no way out. I am thankful to know that God’s grace is greater than my sin.  Second, he met his future wife. Isn’t it wonderful that we can sometimes with blind luck fall into the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow? Like me, my son “out punted his coverage!” His wife has been the answer to pray, she saw in him the tenderness of that 5 year old. She saw the love of young man that had a heart that really did desire God. She helped save my son. For that, I will always be eternally thankful. I am happy to say that my son is a wonderful Christian adult. He loves the Lord, he loves his family, and he loves the Lord’s family. He is active and ever present and accountable to God. His actions speak volumes he truly loves the Lord.

So, fathers do not become so discouraged with your sons that you are ready to write them off. Look in the mirror, is he cut from the same cloth as you? Be careful for in our desire to make them love the Lord, we very well could drive them away from the precious Savior. Rather than make them, raise them in the Lord. My son had ups & downs, but he was never for from God. We all are accountable for our own salvation. My time of impact, of teaching him at the age of 22 had past. I remember him telling me a story of a college roommate that had no relationship with his dad at all. As they were on the basketball court my son told him “I can tell my dad anything, he will listen, he will advise, but more importantly he will love me!” During our time of great discord I had failed to fulfill the great law of love. Fathers, we must raise our children in the Lord if we want them to be His, we must never lose sight of the biblical principles and Gods plan for the family.